We’re just past the halfway point of the year, and I certainly feel the need to “reset” back to my word (Rest, in case you forgot). Life gets crazy and then priorities get out of whack and everything just, well, goes to hell.
(As an aside, I wrote the previous paragraph, then the baby woke up, then my sister and her kids dropped in, and then it was time to clean up for dinner, and then we ate, and then the kids had to go to bed and we had to get slurpees too, right before bed, and then Chris and I watched Sherlock. Didn’t touch the computer again until this morning, and now, more than 24 hours later, I’m attempting to finish this.)
So here I am. Sitting here, wanting to write SO much. There’s just so many things I mull over all day long. Motherhood, homeschooling, politics, philosophy, faith… and on and on and on.
But really. Right now I’m going to mull over this quote from Sherlock last night. It’s from season 4, episode 2 and I’m not going to spoil WHY Watson is saying this, but I love it.
[The man] Who you thought I was… is the man who I want to be.
I’m still a bit hormonal, but man this pushed me over the edge into tears. Isn’t this how we all feel? Just stop and think about the person you love the most. They tend to look over your flaws and see you as this awesome version of yourself. And really, isn’t that the person who we want to be? Chris sees me as this supermom, and frankly, I see myself as one of the worst moms ever (incidentally that’s what Grace called me yesterday!). But I only WANT to be what he sees me as, this mom who gets things done, and does it all perfectly, while looking super hot.
And this is how God sees us I think. I think he sees us as practically perfect in so many ways. We’re made in his image after all and that counts for an awful lot. He looks at us as these perfectly created persons who have this amazing capacity for love and grace. And all he wants for us, is for us to WANT to be what he sees us as. We can’t achieve that perfection on our own, but if we only want it he’ll give us the grace to achieve what we can. As was discussed at our mom book club this week, we don’t have to strive for perfection, we have to strive for excellence. Be the best you can be and all that jazz.
So for me, that’s where I’m at. Stopping and breathing. Remembering that my vocation isn’t about material success or having it all or being perfect. It’s about sitting and smiling at Maggie as she eats. It’s about saying a silly rhyme about the Trinity with Evie. It’s about Jude learning about the “Magic E” and reading so so well. It’s about Grace reading way past her bedtime and me not worrying about it.
You can knock knock me over, but I’ll get back up again! It’s going to be a fantastic day and I’m ready to take on anything!